Why aren't you a Trump supporter?

I don’t respect shameless hucksters who try to sell a vitamin where you have to mail in your pee

I can count

Those are a few reasons off the top of my head. How ’bout you?

Fox News Entertainment Newsletter: Tom Hanks addresses daughter’s allegations, Keith Urban’s sobriety journey - Fox News

It’s uncool to lurk around teenage girls’ dressing rooms

I know that if I or anyone I know commits a crime we’ll go to the clink

authoritarians can get down on the floor and bite my ass, yesterday

Quantum Time-Freeze: Lasers Lock Quantum States 1,000x Longer - SciTechDaily

I understand that when you lose an election you step the fuck aside and take it like a man rather than invade the Capitol while your loss is being made official just because you’re a fucking snowflake WIMP

I don’t believe there is a fucking “president of the Virgin Islands”

I didn’t get out of military service with fucking “bone spurs” that I paid a doctor to write

What are some of the greatest marketing disasters in history?

I don’t believe that Saudi Arabia and Russia “will vedoop bedeep uhhhh”

I know that sounds DO NOT cause cancer.

I have an acute aversion to scumbags

New theory proposes time has three dimensions, with space as a secondary effect - Phys.org

I took the same Oath and took it seriously

I see through liars

I have complete contempt for fakery

Job openings rise in middle of trade wars, but businesses are slower to hire - MarketWatch

I don’t respect a sleazeball who lies about his height just so he can lie about his weight

I don’t run and hide from a debate like a fucking WIMP just becuase some moderator asked pointed questions

A real man doesn’t grab women by the p***y

Cal Raleigh’s heroics can’t save Mariners as Orioles complete sweep - The Seattle Times

I know who the president of Turkey really is

I have complete contempt for traitorism

I have complete contempt for intentional stupidity

JWST spies frigid alien world on bizarre orbit: 'One of the coldest, oldest and faintest planets that we've imaged to date' - Space

I understand how hurricane paths work

I don’t believe in asking the people of Iowa “how stupid are the people of Iowa”

I actually pay taxes

'Lilo & Stitch' and 'Hawaii Five-O' actor David Hekili Kenui Bell dies at 57 - Entertainment Weekly

I know that he didn’t run against “Obamna”

I don’t pretend not to know who David Dooky is just because he can deliver votes

I don’t cotton to rapists

On Which Part of the Body Might One Wear Winklepickers? - Slate Magazine

I understand that you can’t just fucking nuke a hurricane

I have no sicko desire to control women or have a bizarro hangup with “blood”

I don’t buy made-up stories of “thousands and thousands of people dancing on rooftops”

Xbox sale round-up June 17, 2025 - TrueAchievements

I have a reading level above third grade

When I go Greenland shopping and Denmark says no I don’t melt down like a fucking WIMP

I don’t buy bullshit

Horoscope for Tuesday, 6/10/25 by Christopher Renstrom - SFGATE

I know the difference between “give me your tired, your poor” and “they’re poisoning our blood”

I know the difference between Sioux City and Sioux Falls and even Sioux Center

When a reporter declines to join me in the rooftops fantasy I don’t go on stage and gyrate to mock his congenital disability

What are some of the best relationship advice for men?

Let us count the ways. Captain Obvious says:

I have complete contempt for fraudsters, and even less for repeat ones

I don’t call Tim Cook “Tim Apple” and if I do I don’t deny what’s right there on the videotape because I’m too much of a fucking WIMP to handle Reality

If a person stops thinking one or two words in a second or half second means he had stopped thinking for half second?

I understand historical events enough to know there were no airports in the eighteenth century, that Canada didn’t burn the White House half a century before it existed and that World War Two already happened

It’s uncool to set up soft porn pics with your own preteen daughter

If someone works for me, I actually pay them

I know the difference between “George Bush” and “Jeb Bush”

I don’t believe Nazis, Klan klowns and white supremacists chanting “Jews will not replace us” comprise “very fine people”

I don’t believe the way to respond to a hurricane is to call a press conference to describe it as “wet from the standpoint of water”, to distribute Play Doh, or to stand at a podium throwing rolls of paper towels as if they were bottles of ketchup

I don’t hold serial bankrupters in high regard

I respect women and don’t respect those who don’t

I know there’s no such thing as invisible planes

I’ve never tried to pretend the word would means wouldn’t

I understand geography enough to know that Belgium is not a “beautiful city”, that Paris is not in fucking Germany, that India does share a border with China, that that border is peppered with Bhutan and Nepal, not “Button” and “Nipple”, that time zones exist, that “shithole countries” do not, that “England” and “the UK” are not the same thing, that you cannot build a wall in Colorado to keep out New Mexico, and that the Bronx is not and has never been “a very wonderful place in fucking Germany”

I don’t watch or listen to advertising

I know what Nikki Haley’s authority with the National Guard is

I understand that you can’t inject bleach or light

I can read

I don’t hide in my hotel room while everybody else keeps the appointed time and place because my hair might get wet

I respect other cultures and don’t respect those who don’t

EVEN FUCKING MIKE PENCE understands that

Fuck that piece of orange shit, fuck his idiocracy, fuck his sexism, fuck his racism, fuck his religionism, fuck his divisionism, fuck his lying, fuck his orange face paint, fuck his worship of Cult of Ignorance, fuck his Cult, fuck his jingoistic horseshit, fuck his manuipulations, fuck his toddler-age WIMPism, fuck his fucked-up values of ME ME ME and did I mention ME, and fuck him personally with a giant razor sharp dildo that’s been preheated to 204.7° F and built to the dimensions of the Washington Monument. Slowly.